The B*tch is Back!

*Read this post as if Elton John is singing that song in the background.  Loud and Proud!

It's been a while since I've posted and the last few have been pretty weak.  Clearly all I've done consistently is eat. I noticed it in a picture from New Year's Eve too! eek!  Oh and drink wine, forgot about that.

Professionally, my life is going well.  I'm enjoying my new job and love the people I work with.  It's a very low stress, low drama environment.  We had a fun, fun Christmas party!  I'm not even dreading going back to work tomorrow after a holiday weekend!

Romantically my life is well, complete shit.  The boyfriend and I have broken up and gotten back together so many times in the last few months that I've lost count.  After duking it out over text messages and facebook, we both realized it's just not working.  I just can't quit though.  Basically, I told him to take some time and get his life in order and then maybe we could try again.  I told him take a year if he needed to.  I also said I couldn't make any promises though.  I'm not going to spend that year pining for him.  I'm going to go and live my life and hopefully we end up coming back together.  If not then we really aren't meant to work.

I'm glad it's a new year.  I need to start fresh.  I need a new attitude and I'm working on it.  I've been asked out a couple of times since Thanksgiving and I've said no.  I know I need to heal and grow on my own.  I need to decide what I really want in life and what I deserve.  No more accepting less than I deserve.  No more excuses for others' poor behavior.  No more excuses for my poor decisions.  Bring on 2012 because I'm back y'all! 

Instead of the resolution going out though, it's the man! Adios!

Buffalo Chicken Ring

The other night I decided to get off my behind and actually cook something.  I made this Buffalo Chicken Ring and it was soooo good!  My parents, brother, sister-in-law, and picky nephew all liked it.

Buffalo Chicken Ring

Ingredients

8 oz cream cheese
1/2 packet ranch powder mix
Diced celery to taste
Buffalo wing sauce to taste
Diced/shredded chicken, cooked (2-3 chicken breasts worth, or 1-2 cans of canned chicken)
2 packages crescent rolls
Ranch dressing for dipping (optional)

Preparation

Preheat oven to 375 degrees. On a cooking sheet, spread the unrolled crescent rolls out leaving a small circle in the middle. Mix chicken and buffalo sauce to taste and add in celery. In separate bowl, mix cream cheese and 1/2 ranch packet together. Microwaving cream cheese for about 30 seconds makes mixing easier. Mix all ingredients together.

Place spoonfuls of mixture on crescent rolls and fold rolls over to form a ring shape and cook for about 15 minutes or until crescent rolls are nicely browned. Serve with ranch dressing and extra hot sauce for dipping.

I got the recipe from jayesel.com.

This picture is from the original page.

I left the celery out of course and didn't think it needed ranch for dipping at all.  It was awesome by itself.  Here's what mine looked like. 

Not bad for the first time!

Tex-Mex Chowder

Since the weather here in Central Texas has finally gotten below 80 degrees, I figured it was soup time!  I made one of my very favorites.  As with most of my recipes, this one has very little nutritional value and is not at all low-fat or low-cal.  Let me introduce you to some cheesy goodness.

Tex-Mex Chowder

serves 6 

1 lb ground beef 

1 large onion, diced

1 (15 1/4 ounce) can corn, undrained

1 (16 ounce) can pinto beans or black beans, undrained

1 (10 ounce) can Ro-Tel tomatoes, undrained 

1 lb Velveeta cheese

1 cup milk

Brown ground beef with onion; drain fat well.
In a large pot combine ground beef, corn, beans, and Ro-tel tomatoes.
Cube cheese and add to soup pot; stir over low heat until melted and blended.
Add milk as needed to get desired consistency.  

*I used Ranch Style Beans instead of pinto or black and dehydrated onions instead of a whole onion.  Enjoy!

My Tex-Mex Chowder

I'm Back Y'all!

It's been six months since I started applying for jobs in the big city and  I haven't found anything.  Well, actually, no one chose me.  My current position is a whopping 4.5 hours a week!  That does not even come close to paying the bills!  I've been staying with my cousin three days a week when I worked and then coming back to my little town the rest of the time.  I've been hoping something full-time would come up so I can move to the big city, but it just hasn't happened and my family can't keep supporting me, nor do I want them to.  Last weekend I ran into a friend from high school and she told me one of the local insurance agencies was looking for an office assistant.  I happened to have my resume in my truck and so she passed it along to her friend who worked there.  When I got home I emailed my resume and cover letter to the agency manager.  He emailed me back within a couple of hours.  I had an interview on Thursday and Friday I started working.  I am now employed full-time!!!  Thank you, Jesus!  I had some reservations before the interview because taking this job means giving up my big city dreams for a while, like at least a couple of years.  I talked to my boyfriend also because I wasn't sure what this meant for us either.  He was extremely supportive and said he had no problem coming to see me more often.  For the last few months I've been in his city, so I always went to see him.  Knowing that he was supportive helped a lot.  I already knew a couple of the people in the office and the other three are great so far.  It's a small office and a very low stress group.  I think this job is exactly what I need right now.  It's in a fairly quiet environment.  The people are friendly.  It's not a stressful place at all.  I'm getting used to the idea that I'm going to be working in my hometown, the town where gossip abounds.  My dad already reminded me, no more going to the local bar! lol!  He wasn't kidding though.  I haven't worked in my hometown since high school.  It's been twelve years since I've been a full-time resident here.  It has it's perks though.  I really enjoy seeing familiar faces come in the office every day.  I can't tell you how many people have congratulated me on the job, knowing what I've been through the last few years.  The people really are supportive and I've missed that.  I'm going to have to get used to having to go out of town to have a drink, but oh well.  My aunt always says when God closes a door, he opens a window.  I think this time instead of a window it was more like a screen door!  But then, that is where I feel most comfortable.

Country Girl's Dream

Monday night I had the opportunity to go to a concert that is every country girl's dream!  It was a benefit concert for the Central Texas area wildfires.  The line up included George Strait, Willie Nelson, The Dixie Chicks, Asleep at the Wheel, Randy Rogers Band, and at least four others.  It was AMAZING!!!  This really is a once in a life time type of line up.  What's even cooler is that all the musicians that performed are from Texas.  Y'all know how much I love Texas!  My seats weren't quite as stellar as the music, but that's okay.  I was sorta behind the stage, but very close, so I could see the performers talking to the band and watch them when the first walked on stage, so it turned out well.  They music was perfect.  I knew every song the five big performers played.  My boyfriend went with me. (yes, we're back on)  He's not a huge country music fan, but he had a good time and was a good sport about how completely excited I was.  I clapped and danced in my seat and sang and oh it was awesome!  If you don't know who these musicians are, you really need to look them up!

The Dixie Chicks

Willie Nelson

(Deborah Cannon AMERICAN-STATESMAN- all 3 photos)

George Strait waves to the crowd as he walks onstage at Fire Relief: The Concert for Central Texas at the Frank Erwin Center on Monday, October 17, 2011

 

Magnetic Personality

Apparently I have one of those magnetic personalities.  Too bad it's the insane freaks that I seem to draw in.  They're like a moth to flame!  Seriously, why?  The last few months I've tried to be friends with an ex-boyfriend.  Yeah, not my brightest moment I know.  Basically, I feel bad for him because he has some anxiety issues and therefore, not many friends.  We hang out and chit chat or whatever.  I went over the other night and he proceeded to put the moves on me.  When I said no, he called me a bitch.  Yes, a grown man called me a bitch for not sleeping with him.  I looked at him and said that wasn't nice and he said, "Well, you're being a bitch."  I said, "Okay, I can be a bitch at home. Bye."  I hadn't talk to him since.  Then tonight this genius texts me and asks me to come over.  I reminded him that he called me a bitch last time we hung out.  He said sorry and then asked if we could have sex!  I'm like ummm, NO.  I said I just want to be friends with him.  He said, "Hellooo, haven't you heard of friends with benefits???".  I said no again and added a smiley face.  He told me to go to hell!  Then he texts me again five minutes later asking if I'll come over tomorrow. Um yeah, sure, ok.  HA!  Charmers like that get me every time. *Insert eye roll here.

Right or Wrong?

It's been a strange couple of weeks.  The job is going well, but things aren't so great in the relationship area.  After a lot of thought, I decided to take a break from the relationship, not really a break up, but just a break.  I have great friends and a great family.  I am finally working too, so why am I so sad?  I've been really trying to figure that out and I came to the conclusion that I spend 95% of the time missing him and 5% of the time actually talking to him.  At the end of the day I have so much stuff I want to tell him and he's not there, not answering the phone, not returning texts for hours or til the next day.  We see each other maybe once a week.  It's been like 9 months or something and it's been like this for probably the last 6 months.  We talked about it last night and I wasn't sure what to do.  He couldn't offer any sort of solution or say that he could be more available.  The one thing he did say made things really clear all of the sudden though.  He said maybe because I have more time on my hands and am not working full-time, I'm just lonely.  That actually made me mad.  If I wanted to go out with friends every single weekend I could.  If I just needed a warm body, he could easily be replaced.  I want him, not just anyone.  I'm telling him I miss HIM and he just sees me as some pathetic lonely mess.  At that moment I stopped crying and told him I wanted a break.  I saw how he sees me.  How can you be in love with someone you think is a sad little mess?  I'm going to concentrate on me for a while.  Maybe he can take some time for himself.  I don't know. I'm not looking for another relationship.  I really want that one to work, but it's really NOT working the way it is.  I need more.  I want to be a real part of his life, not an after thought.  All I know is I feel like I did the right thing for me this time.  It doesn't make me happy, but I had to do it.