All the Feelings of a Crazy Person

As you know, I started dating a great guy a few months ago.  I have fallen completely, head over heels, in love with him.  It seems that he loves me too!  I feel so incredibly lucky to have met him.  I've met his children and really enjoy spending time with them.

Because we currently live almost an hour away from each other, we've decided to move in together.  I'll be moving to the big city since I'm basically unemployed.  This amazing man is willing to move in with me knowing I don't have a job yet.  I know I would do the same for him, yet I'm still wondering why he would even consider it.  It was actually his idea too.  I'm so scared that I'm not going to find a job soon enough and he is going to see me for the big, fat loser I really am.  (Yes, I know most of that is all in my head.)  I keep waiting for him to get mad at me, but it hasn't happened.  Does he occasionally get annoyed with me?  Of course, he is human, after all and I do have some pretty annoying qualities! :)  I get mildly annoyed with him, but only about small things like when he doesn't charge his phone, forgets his phone, loses his phone, or something similar.  That's because I'm all about the talking and he doesn't place near as much value on excessive communication.  Overall, though we are great!

I will be taking on a new role when we move in together.  This one makes me particularly nervous!  I'll be helping him raise his three children 50% of the time.  His son is 10 and his daughters are 4 and 3.  I don't love the term stepmom, but I guess that's basically what I'll be.  I couldn't be more excited about being part of a family, his family specifically.  I'm extremely apprehensive about how his children will adjust to our new living arrangement.  I'm also totally pumped about the prospect of gradually having a parental relationship with these kids.  I just hope they don't hate me or resent me simply because I'm the outsider.  They are three amazing kids, but then how could they not be with such an amazing dad!

On Saturday, we are going to look at apartments.  We won't actually move until June, but rates are going up daily, so it's time to get on it.  I am beyond excited!  I can't wait to look for our home together.  I'm also excited about moving out of my little town.  I'll be close enough to visit, but out of the monotony.  Sing it with me y'all, "I'm so excited and I just can't fight it! I know I know I know I know..."